ISO Time Machine

ISO Time Machine

time machine

Meme found here

YOU GUYS, why is April/May such a shit show? I mean, seriously, I haven’t been able to think let alone try to blog. I am emotionally and physically exhausted from life, right now.

Just the other day at work, my Director came up to me to ask me how things were going:

Me: “Honestly, I would like to go to sleep tonight and wake up on May 25th.”

FOR REALS!!! I need a time machine to get me to summer.

BUT, it hasn’t all been bad. So, in honor of trying to always see the silver lining, I will say that we did have a nice family weekend in Legoland for the April birthdays. Apparently, half the family has a birthday in April. FYI – I could really benefit from a loan that month. All the presents! It’s like Christmas in April here in the burbs, people.

Back to Legoland….fun was had by all, despite all the small children and theme park stuff and all that. However, the best part was later in the evening in the Legoland Hotel. They have kid activities, which meant momma got to sit and have a beer while kids played with Legoland staff. Thankyouverymuch, Legoland people.

That night they were having a Lego Builder contest with a Dinosaur theme. Meaning, build the best looking dinosaur with Lego’s – unless, you are my daughter. If you’re my daughter you build this:

jamie 1

“Jamie, what kind of Dinosaur is that?”
“It’s not a Dinosaur. It’s a time machine. That’s me in the time machine. I’m going to back into time so I can see Dinosaurs!”
“What kind of Dinosaur are you going to go see?”
“A Velociraptor!”

YOU GUYS! First, I thought my child was a genius. I couldn’t believe how smart she is.

But then, THEN, I started to get nervous. You see, she was VERY excited to be in the contest. I had concerns that the Legoland staff may not be as enamored of Jamie’s ability to see out of the box, as much as I was. So, we went to dinner on-site and waited for the announcements of the winners at 7:30 pm, holding our breaths that she wouldn’t be disappointed if she didn’t win.

Boy, were we all surprised when they called her name as the Lego Master Builder for the night!

jamie 2

This is one of those parenting moments, that you don’t forget. She was so so happy. I’m so very grateful that the Legoland staff appreciated her creativity that night. So, THANK YOU, LEGOLAND!

She got a handmade card, a pin, and to keep her Lego creation. However, given the level of excitement you would have thought she won $1 million dollars!



Magic does exist!

Magic does exist!


Image retrieved here

YOU GUYS! Today, on my way to work, I remembered back to my honeymoon/birthday when I went to see David Copperfield and I was chosen to be on stage. Most people would brag about this, but that day was the day I stopped believing in magic.

*This is the point where I start laughing hysterically in my car. Alone.

But, seriously, people. On my 29th birthday, I was on my honeymoon and my new husband takes me to see one of the most famous magicians. I actually get chosen to be on stage and receive an autographed picture. This is supposed to be a good memory, no?

Well, I was heart-broken. Because, believe it or not, I sat on stage with my eyes closed believing I was going to disappear into thin air. You know, MAGIC! Instead, I do a shit ton of work, including running in high heels, because I am a girl, on my birthday, during my honeymoon, in Vegas, at a show.

I’ll never forget the look on my husband’s face….

He was waiting for me after the show, along with other people. They all wanted to know,

“How did he do it?” 

There I was all pouty face, like

WTF. That wasn’t magic!” <insert crying emoji>

Now, the face he’s making is the one where he realizes he just married 3 days prior the most naive 29-year-old girl in the world. It was a mixture of incredulous and concern and hysterics all wrapped into one. He calmly says,

“Well, he’s an illusionist.”

The reason I’m bringing this is up, is because I realized today in morning traffic, that I was wrong: There is such a thing as magic. And, yes. Magic does take work.

You know how I know this now?

Because, I’M A MOM.

I’m freaking making magic every damn day.

I’m sending emails to Santa, receiving notes from tooth fairies, magically making elves move about the house and cause disaster. I’m luring kids out of bed with Pokemon Go, curing ailments with magic sprays, getting kids to eat veggies without them realizing it. I’m catching leprechaun’s, making medicine taste like chocolate, surprising kids at school at lunchtime.

I didn’t realize it then because I was in my 20’s and I had no life experiences. But, I realize it now.

Magic happens every day, if you make it happen! Most of life is an illusion. You can either enjoy it for what it is, or make a pouty face and complain about your experience not being the way you imagined it.

This time around I’m enjoying the show!